Question:
Okay, I lied. I did leave part of the story out. IF anyone wants to read from the beginning, here is the Part 1
Basically, I strongly like the Guy Next Door who we shall call 'Pretty Boy.' I'm not suppose to have a bf until after college.
I don't know how this happen. There's are issue between the families. Things were good, but it all started about two months back. Pretty Boy's parents haven't been feeling the love for a long while now. My mom said that his mom is trying to steal my mom's bf. My mom claims that his mom won't let her have happiness. So there are constant arguements between my mom and her bf, then dragged the neighbors along.
About Three Weeks Ago
Everything just falls into places and sets everything off. On a Saturday night, my mom, her friend from work, and I went to her company banquet. We were getting ready. I had on my dress from prom, but then I changed into an above the knee skirt. My mom has on something similar. Her bf comes home asking where are we going. My mom told him the company banquet. He got all mad because he wasn't going. (That's so stupid because couple weeks before he said he was busy and didn't want to go.) That night he claim that he didn't say that and all these other bull stuff. Calling me a whore. (So not true. Being catholic has role in that part.)So we went anyways. All we did was grub on good food and waited to see if we won any door prizes. He packed all he stuff and left.
Oh well... right? WRONG! I went to sleep when we came home around 10:40pm-ish. Later that night, I was stirred awake by my mom's voice. Hearing her voice it an automatic wake up call for me. I hear her and her bf talking, then arguing. I heard her say don't hit me. Second, I heard a loud smack. My mom said don't hit me. It was annoying me. I got off my bed and when into her room and said STOP HITTING HER! Her bf gets all in my face saying You don't know what the F is going on.... Every other word was the F word. He points his finger in my face and pushes it to the side, grabs my arm, and pushes me back. My mom like 'It's between you and me. Not my daughter.'
I went back to bed. I was tick. I even had an adrenaline rush. I felt like knocking the life out him. I couldn't clam myself down. Then my mom once again drags the neighbors into the situation. The oldest son and my mom talked. Her bf comes into my room and talk to me and my sister. He all saying he loves my mom, he left his kids for love, and he is better than my dad. BS. He is no better than my dad. He left his kids just like my dad.
My mom was telling I'm allow to associate with the next door neighbors because their mom won't let her have happiness. I felt really crappy after she told me that because she knows I talk to them online. Couple nights later, I couldn't sleep. I freak cry every tear drop I had. I was trying to figure out what to do.... sacrifices my feelings to obey my mom or keep on continuing. It was 2 AM and I was still awake in bed. My sister had her stupid radio on. My mom walks in and starts yelling at us mainly me. She yelled at me for still being awake. Then for no darn reason, she took the vaccuum extension stick and hit me with it. I was like 'what did I do wrong, I trying to sleep...' I was too depressed to talk back or anything. I thought I had cried all my tears out, but I was wrong... For another hour I cried, I think I cried myself to sleep that night.
12/17-12-23 is probably the worst week of my life. I was stuck in a situation that isn't my fault. I still talked to Pretty Boy through emails. I was going to break off the communciation the same week, but I didn't. I didn't want my mom making every decision for me. During the X-mas week, I was out of town. I keep in contact with him through emails, then text messages and phone calls. Even the other night, I was talking to him secretly out in my patio.
All my life I held back because I always thought of my family. I listen to my mom's orders, took all of the physical abuse she given me, let my mom's make my decisions. I didn't beg my mom for things I knew I couldn't have.
I know it's wrong for keeping him a secret for everyone. Only my youngest sister and best friend knows I still talk to him. The more I talk to him, the more I know I CAN'T let go. I even told him that I'm not suppose to talk to him, but I also told him I was my decision to keep on talking to him. I am positive the feelings for each other are mutual.
I don't want to let a chance slip by me. I don't want to end things and wonder what could have happen if I didn't.
Am I being selfish by continuing talking to Pretty Boy? For keeping him apart of my life? I'm going to tell him about my feeling although I'm pretty sure he knows already. I'm so obvious. What should I do?
By the way, I'm not gonna give up or give in....
I'm gonna give it my all.
Answer:
Go ahead ~ Give it your all ^^ I'll support you! I think you deserve to make your own decisions and to find your own happiness. Your mother should always be there and love you no matter what. Good luck with him!
Answer:
I don't think you are being selfish. You deserve your own happiness too! Your mom wants hers' she should let you have yours : ]. I'm glad you are not giving upppp! I'll support you too! Good Luck!!! I hope everything comes out the best for you..and hope you'll tell us the results : ]! And I would have kicked ur mom's boyfriend's butt! Be like don't hit my mom! *BAM* but oh well that's over and you shouldnt let him touch u either, he is not your dad.
Answer:
hmm..
you're not being selfish...
and your mumz bf doesnt seem reliable and stable...
i can forsee him leaving your mum in the distant future...
but what is all that with your neighbours mum trying to take away your mumz happiness???
maybe that neighbour have seen something that your mumz bf did..
and shes trying to warn your mum about it...
but your mum is blinded by her love for him...
nehh..
